so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
I walked in on my roommate finishing watching something on his computer. There was cum all over his screen. He awkwardly said hi and pulled up his pants.
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
Randomize
