My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
I made him laugh his dick is mine
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
Randomize
