i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
either way he was missing a nipple.
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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