Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
He made a toga out of my hot pink bed sheets and cracked an egg on his head. Then he proceeded to alphabetize our DVD collection, which was impressive because I'm 99% sure he couldn't have done that sober.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Randomize
