i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
