I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
handjob tips. give me some.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
dude you literally had like 30 screwdrivers, i thought you were gonna die
that explains why my vomit smells like it came from florida
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
I feel awkward having to tell people “sorry you can’t finger me because I will get a UTI and I don’t have health insurance”
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
Randomize
