when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
Randomize
