I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
Randomize