It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
I swear to god there was like a 2-second timespan in which he went from laughing to coughing, hiccuping, and subsequently projectile vomiting into the grass. There is literally a line in the grass, about 2 yards long, of his puke. It was more impressive than disgusting to be honest. And then he just shrugged and said "I have no idea where that came from."
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
Randomize
