i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
Randomize
