I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
Then you screamed in her face to shut up about thick thighs saving lives because actually they can suffocate people during oral sex
Drunk me is very safety conscious And apparently just as annoyed by her as sober me
Randomize
