I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
He sent me a picture of his ass and said the backdoor is open. Almost grabbed my keys and a condom before I saw it was a group text. Not nearly drunk enough for his desperation.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
I don't know man, I woke up and shes here acting like she knows me, wearing my clothes, and scrambling eggs in my kitchen. I don't know her.
You were drinking with me last night, I warned you.
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
Randomize
