Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
Too bad they don't have an emoji symbol for condoms and 99 cent tacos
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
Randomize
