I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
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