i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
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