As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
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