dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
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