found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
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