it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
Green mimosas i think yes
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
Randomize
