I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
Idk if I want to put a bra on
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
