Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
your cat followed me a mile away from your house. if it doesn't come back, i'm sorry, but I needed to get laid tonight.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
Randomize
