I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
Randomize