Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
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