Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
So squirting runs in the family.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
Randomize
