rhymes with "ouble enetration"
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
Dude, I totally just made my launch phrase on my new phone "Wingardium Leviosa" so that when people try it and it doesn't work I can say, "It's leveeOHsa, not leveeoh-SA."
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
Randomize