Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
Randomize
