10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
Randomize
