whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
she smelled like a LAN party
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
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