I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
Randomize
