It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
My dad is sitting where you rode me
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
Randomize