drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
She even gives head with a lisp.
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
Randomize
