i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
Randomize
