apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
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