Having a random hookup so left but love u
Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
So, we're in the car ready to fuck and she asks about my ex. I wave at my lap and say, "bye". She asks what I'm doing. I say, "waving goodbye to my erection"
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
Randomize
