I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
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