if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize
