The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
