What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
Randomize
