no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
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