Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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