That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
How external is "for external use only"?
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
So apparently I tried texting you last night to tell you I wasn't coming home, but all I had typed were lyrics from Evita
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
Randomize
