It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
Randomize
