What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize