No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
Boobs are out for the taking
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
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