Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
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