; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Randomize
