D3 body, D1 cock
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
we're so committed to being not committed
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
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