belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Randomize
