I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
I just saw an old lady yelling at a dead pigeon for leaving the oven on.
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
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