I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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