What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
Randomize
