Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
You told the bartender at least five times that you were naming your son "Jagermeister" but you would use the bartender's name "Fernando" as his middle name. You were drunk.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
Randomize
